A memorable night for me, that I didn’t talk about until roughly two years ago, taught me much about glorifying God. More specifically, what it means to delight in glorifying God, even in suffering. In high school, I had a life-changing experience. Not because it was exciting, relaxing, or fun, but because of how painful it was. Painful, but necessary. And, if I could add one more thing, quite beautiful.

Whether raised in the church or not, no one is born a believer. That’s because, to be a true believer, one must hear, understand, and embrace the gospel. “Repent and believe,” Mark 1:15 reads. Numerous Christians can recall a breathtaking, powerful moment when they put faith in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. But for those raised in the church, it’s often easy to take our faith for granted and pretend our testimonies are boring, especially when we can’t recall when or how our conversion took place. But the miracle of salvation is never boring.

I used to think my testimony was flat. I grew up going to church, doing Awanas, singing in choirs — the works. Really, I didn’t think much about it. I lived, in a sense, as someone going through the motions. My life was enjoyable, I just wasn’t on fire for anything.

But that night in high school was a stark turning point. It occurred after months of allowing anxiety, discontent, and loneliness to fester within. I’ll spare the details on how I got to this point. The important aspect is I was, indeed, at a very low point. And for the first time, that fateful night, I questioned my existence.

Why? I recall pleading with God. Why am I here? Why am I hurting? And what’s the point?

I asked that last question because I didn’t see a point. It was the darkest moment I’ve endured, because it’s the only moment in my life where I lost sight of the purpose my life had. I felt empty and neglected by God. I didn’t consider the plans He may have for me, nor did I consider the inherent value I had being made in His image. I ignored time in Scripture, and up to the moment I sat alone in my bedroom begging God for an explanation, I scarcely prayed. In fact, if my memory serves me correctly, the night I cried to God that I didn’t understand why I was alive was the first time I’d attempted to speak to Him in months.

And even though I ignored Him for so long, He quickly answered me. He said, “Be still. I am with you.”

“Be still,” I heard, and my tears went from sorrow to joy. “I am with you,” He whispered, and the room, which felt dark and heavy, became bright and weightless. And in those few words, the Lord revealed truths that altered my life indefinitely.

For months, I felt anxious and discontent, but I was reminded that I’m able to be still in the Lord, because He truly cares. In Matthew 11:28-29 Jesus said, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” In Isaiah 41:10, God declared, “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” My months of restlessness caused me to overlook those truths. I praise God for reminding me.

I was lonely, and I made it worse by isolating myself. But the Lord reminded me that He’s always with me. Deuteronomy 31:8 proclaims, “The LORD Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” It was a humble reminder, after months of thinking no one was there, that the Lord Himself is right by my side.

But I wanted to breeze through those points to emphasize the main reminder the Lord provided, namely, that I’m a follower of King Jesus Christ; a child of God with an inheritance in heaven. So, what does that mean?

It actually applies to all believers, and it means, no matter our circumstances, we’ve been born again. The Lord gave us new life, which means we’re no longer dead in our sin and we will never truly taste death. It means our lives have eternal purpose, and that our purpose is to love God and to serve Him and His kingdom. It means our lives are being used by Him to fulfill His perfect, good, and righteous will. Oh, to be a follower of Christ means none of us ever have to question our existence. We know where we came from. We know why we’re here. We know where we’re going.

Why are we alive? The chief end of man, as the church declares, is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

Perhaps I once thought my testimony was boring, but this revelation is what allowed me to understand my salvation in ways I previously didn’t. We experience joy by the grace of God, and we praise and thank Him for that. We experience pain, but by the grace of God, no pain will ever overcome us. And in His sovereign will, He works all things together for the good of those who love Him. Often, it’s the hardship that makes His grace, love, mercy, and faithfulness far more abundant to our weary souls. All of creation sings praises to its Creator, and His people are to do the same.

What I realized many moons ago is that my life was designed to worship my Creator. I was made for Jesus and to glorify His name. And that night, I realized that, to bring God glory, means our entire lives are fixed on Him. To glorify God is to surrender our will for His. To glorify God means to go through trial and praise Him through it. To glorify God is to understand this life isn’t really about is. It’s about Him.

Only a matter of years ago, I felt ashamed by the emotions I had that night. For years, I felt I had no right to be that downcast. But now I see the circumstances far differently. Although it’s often still difficult to relive such experiences, I delight in that the Lord provided me with such a painful, necessary, and beautiful opportunity to realize that my position in life, as Pastor Samuel Sey said, is that “I gave Christ a cross, yet He’ll give me a crown. I made Him die, yet He makes me live. I give Him sin, yet He gives me salvation.” And as the hymn goes, “All to Him I owe.

In questioning my life, I recognized I owe God my life. Not part of it, but all of it. And I find now, when I hit lows, I don’t have to complain or doubt. Rather, rain or shine, I can delight in the experiences I endure, so long as it brings God glory.

There may be someone reading this who has similar questions to the ones I had. My prayer is that the reminders the Lord gave me can be reminders for you. Your life is rooted in the eternal purpose of glorifying your Creator, and there is no sweeter truth.

So, beloved, I wonder, do you delight in what brings God glory?