Humans are lonelier than ever before. Even before the pandemic, almost five out of 10 U.S. adults reported experiences of loneliness. For young adults aged 15-24, time spent in-person with friends has fallen almost 70% from 2003 to 2020, from about two and half hours down to 40 minutes per day. The lack of meaningful interaction comes with a cost. Research finds that a lack of social connections can be as dangerous to our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Humans were designed for community, not for isolation. But the solution is always trickier than it first appears.

In a culture that values independence and autonomy, making time for community seems tangential or even burdensome. For some, the mere thought of a social event depletes their personal energy battery. In a fallen world, relationships are complicated. People can be our best friends, and cruelest enemies. We get burned, withdraw, and then experience loneliness while making little effort to socialize.

Our society subtly reinforces the concept that reality is something to flee or escape; a bad dream to smother underneath a barrage of entertainment, information, or other forms of distraction. With the proliferation of smartphones, unplugging from the current situation and escaping into the digital sphere has never been so easy or so tempting. Additionally, many in-person connection points have now moved to screens. Online college options, virtual training, and remote jobs are increasingly prevalent. That’s not to say that online spaces are somehow bad or should be avoided; rather, with every advantage (think flexibility, cost, and time-savings), there is always a disadvantage (a sense of association without the anchor of relationships).

The issue is that we don’t reinvest the time and resources gained by the virtual world back into in-person relationships and interactions. The data provides the proof. In 2018, Pew Research Center found, “A majority of Americans (59%) say they feel some attachment to their local community, but only 16% say they feel very attached; 41% say they are not too or not at all attached to the community where they live. Adults in urban, suburban and rural areas report nearly identical levels of attachment to their local community.”

Our immediate community often lacks the tailoring, diversity, and ability to fast-forward that the digitalscape so frequently offers. Marketers call this phenomenon fragmentation: the splintering of groups defined by distinct preferences or requirements. When we get used to such customization to our preferences, we naturally grow more isolated from one another as we become increasingly defined by what sets us apart.

But there’s no easy fix. After all, relationships are the result of time, energy, effort, and being authentic about ourselves and with others (not to mention the emotional stakes that come with the drama and messiness of other sinners). But that’s the interesting thing. Redemptive history starts with two people in a garden and reaches its climax as a cultivated city: a sanctified arena when God’s creation and a multitude of people coexist in community. Human flourishing happens in fellowship, not in isolation. And more than ever, Christians need to lead by example.

Brian Brown understands this tension well. He’s the founder and executive director of The Anselm Society, a Colorado-based organization dedicated to a renaissance of the Christian imagination and recapturing the sense of shared community among kingdom-minded creatives. “We live in a culture that has made escapism into a virtue. We’re encouraged by a million cues to be anywhere but here, anyone but who God made us to be,” he remarked to The Washington Stand. “In the face of that, the person who chooses to show up has tremendous power — to see and be seen, to invite others in, to treat the local church and the dinner table as essentials rather than extras. But to do that, we have to dare to see ourselves as God sees us: as beloved bearers of His image.”

As images of God, we reflect him best in our collectiveness and diversity. It’s when the body of Christ comes together in fellowship that we get a more accurate glimpse at the vastness and depth of divine character (Ephesians 4:11-13; 15-16). Through the Messiah’s redemptive work, Christians have the opportunity, indeed the calling, to work towards restoration of the vision.

Despite the digital advances in communication and connection points, people are lonelier than ever before. It’s easy to run with the culture, burying ourselves in the endless mountain of “extra things,” perhaps even attempting to fill our own ache for meaningful connection. There is both pain and reward in pulling our heads out of the mountain and “showing up” in acts of simple relationship-building. “Showing up” doesn’t need to be elaborate, but it needs to be essential and intentional if we are serious about changing the tide of isolation.

In a hurting world, the simple act of being there for someone matters. If Christians are to be known by our love for one another (John 13:35; 2 Corinthians 13:11), we must be willing to demonstrate it.