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Commentary

Biblical Counsel for the Indecisive

October 19, 2024

A recent reading from the FRC Bible reading plan offered biblical encouragement and exhortation for those who struggle with indecision — particularly for young adults, particularly for men. I regularly encounter young men who seem responsible, godly, and winsome, yet for some reason they just can’t seem to get their life going forward — and often the reason is that they are paralyzed by indecision. Perhaps you know a young man like this and seem puzzled about how to help them. Perhaps this describes you, as it once did me.

In any case, the inspired preacher in Ecclesiastes (likely Solomon) offers wise, biblical counsel:

“Rejoice, O young man, in your youth, and let your heart cheer you in the days of your youth. Walk in the ways of your heart and the sight of your eyes. But know that for all these things God will bring you into judgment” (Ecclesiastes 11:9).

The connection to decision-making may not be immediately apparent, so let’s walk through this counsel step by step.

1. Rejoice in your youth.

What does the preacher mean when he exhorts young men to rejoice in their youth and to let their hearts cheer them? He doesn’t mean that they should squander their energies in reckless thrill-seeking. Nor does he recommend focusing exclusively on happy thoughts; the preacher previously commended mourning the dead and hearing rebukes (Ecclesiastes 7:2-5).

Rather, the preacher’s advice comes in the context of the entire book’s theme: “vanity of vanities” (Ecclesiastes 1:2). The opening poem argues that generations will come and go, and their work and memory will fade away like a frosty breath (1:3-11). The final chapter warns that everyone will eventually grow weak with age and lose abilities they once had (12:1-8). So, when the preacher speaks about a time for everything (3:1-8), the times he has in mind are bounded by the bookends of life.

In other words, the preacher’s counsel to young men is: you only live once. Admittedly, “YOLO” has been the unwarranted rationale for many a foolish, reckless, immoral decision, and the preacher would condemn such behavior. Still, in a true, godly, non-reckless way, the preacher counsel’s young men to take their life — the only one they have — and live it to the fullest.

We can see this by seeking the biblical answer to the following question: if there is a time for everything, what is youth the time for? Solomon says in Proverbs 20:29, “The glory of young men is their strength, but the splendor of old men is their gray hair.” Those who are older have more experience (and hopefully more wisdom), but young men have more strength. Therefore, youth is a time for action.

One application for young men is, before they marry, to devote their life “to please the Lord” by serving his church (1 Corinthians 7:32-34). Unattached men have more free time and fewer responsibilities than those who are married, and especially than those who have children. As someone who used to be a single young man, I guarantee that you will regret the missed service opportunities and discipling relationships far more than you will regret not playing more video games.

2. Do what you want.

Some readers may be wondering, if youth is a time for action, what is it that I should do? The preacher supplies an unexpected answer: “Walk in the ways of your heart and the sight of your eyes.” The thrust of these idioms is simply this: do whatever you want to do. Observe what is good. Decide what you like. And then do that.

This may surprise, even shock, some readers.” Hold on just a minute,” they might be thinking. “I know that ‘The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick’ (Jeremiah 17:9). Why would I walk in its ways? I’ve read what havoc was wreaked in Israel when ‘everyone did what was right in his own eyes’ (Judges 21:25). Is the preacher telling me to follow their bad example?”

These cautions are right and necessary, and we will address them shortly. But allowing them to consume our focus and cripple our decision-making is a less-than-biblical perspective. To properly place these limits, we must first go all the way back to Genesis 1 and recognize that sin is a distortion of good creation.

When God created male and female in his image, he blessed them and gave them dominion over the earth (Genesis 1:28). He gave them as food “every plant yielding seed that is on the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit” (Genesis 1:29). And all this was very good (Genesis 1:31). God placed Adam and Eve in a luscious garden filled with “every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food” (Genesis 2:9) and told Adam that he “may surely eat of every tree of the garden,” except one (Genesis 2:16).

In other words, God created man to be happy. He made a world filled with abundant goodness and gave it all to Adam and Eve to enjoy — with limited exceptions. The literal feast for mouth and eyes presented a dazzling array of options that God wanted Adam and Eve to enjoy.

Now, where should Adam and Eve begin? The correct answer is: anywhere they want! If, in the youth of the world, Adam had been paralyzed by indecision — if he had been afraid to pluck an apple lest the orange should taste sweeter — that would not have magnified the bounty of God’s superlative generosity.

Although we live in a world afflicted by the curse and distorted by sin, it still is full of good things that God created — things that we glorify God by enjoying. In the youth of his life, every young man faces a dazzling array of options: whether or where to study, what career to pursue, who to date and eventually marry. Like Adam on his first day in the garden, we can’t foresee all the consequences of the decisions we make, simply due to natural, human limitations. But, also like Adam, we don’t glorify God by being anxious or afraid to choose.

At this point, the analytically inclined reader may ask, but how are we supposed to choose between options if we can’t foresee the consequences? This is where we are forced to trust God and take it on faith that he is good and sovereign over our lives. God works all things for the good of those who love him (Romans 8:28), and he has prepared good works beforehand that we should walk in them (Ephesians 2:10), even if we don’t have a map showing the road ahead.

God’s abundant goodness is sometimes manifested in his offering us multiple-choice decisions with multiple right answers. Perhaps a young man knows of multiple exciting colleges, multiple good job offers, or multiple godly young ladies. When two or more options seem equally wise, equally upright, equally profitable, how can you possibly decide? “Walk in the ways of your heart and the sight of your eyes.” Trust God for the rest.

3. Remember that God is judge.

This leads us back to consider the objection raised earlier: adopting the mantra, “do what feels right,” as a life motto can get the unsuspecting into a world of trouble. Where are the limits? What is the balancing principle? Where is the guardrail that prevents one’s life from careening haplessly into a ravine of passionate excess?

The preacher’s third imperative statement reins in the headstrong youth, “know that for all these things God will bring you into judgment.” Do you want to know what the future consequences of present decisions will be? Here’s one you can know: one day, every single person will stand before God and be judged for his actions. It’s a sobering thought, and warnings of this future reality are repeated throughout Scripture.

The reason why the thought of Judgment Day should sober us is that we all fail to follow God’s law, just as Adam did (Romans 3:23). With a multitude of good decisions he could have made, Adam chose the one tree that violated God’s express command, thereby earning death for himself and for all his offspring who follow in his footsteps of sinful rebellion against God (Romans 5:12).

Our only hope on Judgment Day is to be saved from God’s wrath by the grace he offers in Jesus Christ. And the only way to do that is to “repent and believe” (Mark 1:15), which involves turning away from our sinful desires and actions. For those who truly repent and believe, God promises new life by his Spirit, who gives us a new heart with new and holy desires (Romans 8:5, 11-13). This reshapes our whole outlook on life to be God-honoring, so that what we want now aligns with what pleases God.

As David declared beforehand, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4).

Young adulthood can be an exciting time, and it can also be terrifying. Young men face some of the most important decisions of their lives, at the time in their lives when they have the least experience. (Although I write about young men because that is who the preacher addresses, many of the principles can apply to indecisive people of any age and either sex.)

Making decisions with limited information can be hard. But God isn’t honored by “analysis paralysis” or anxious indecision. He is honored when we rejoice in the abundance of good things he has provided — and then trust him for the results. But, as we walk in Christian freedom through God’s splendid world, we should always remember that there is a final judgment, that he will ultimately hold us accountable for how we live.

Joshua Arnold is a senior writer at The Washington Stand.



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