It’s not easy finding your way as a young Christian in the world today. In a culture hostile to everything they believe, most Gen Zers are desperately trying to find their path, make their mark, and hear the voice of God on everything from their careers to future spouses. Earlier this fall, best-selling author and ministry leader Dr. Voddie Baucham sat down and took a volley of questions on the most pressing issues facing young believers for the “Outstanding Podcast” with FRC’s Joseph Backholm. His reassuring wisdom was worth sharing with a world of young men and women of faith who care about standing for truth but are struggling to know their place in these challenging times.
1. How can we know if we’ve heard from God about what we’re supposed to do?
“If it wasn’t in the Scriptures, it wasn’t God’s voice. God has spoken [and] … His voice is now in His word. If you’re paying attention to anything outside of His word and giving it the authority of His word, then you’re engaged in something that we call idolatry. … And so what we need to spend time doing is reading and digesting and meditating on the word of God so that our thinking can be controlled, directed, and shaped by the word that He’s revealed. Because ultimately, if we start relying on things other than what the Lord has revealed to us in His word, then we’ll never fully be able to answer that question. So everything has to be tested by the Scriptures.”
(Joseph Backholm): “Now make that practical for us, because there is no verse that you opened up that said, ‘Move to Africa and help start African Christian University.’ … They’re not going to open up a Bible verse that says, ‘Thou shalt go to’ wherever…”
“There’s wisdom in a multitude of counselors [too]. [But] you will open up scriptures that will tell you that He will give you the desires of your heart. [Then, ask yourself, is this] what you love? [Is this] where your passions are? Go with that. You know what holds [young people] back? The fear that because they want it, that [it] must not be God. [It’s the] fear that because they desire it, that must be their flesh. And what that leads to is complete speculation and mysticism. Because here’s what’s not going to happen in heaven. God is not in heaven saying, ‘Oh, I hope you pick this one. I hope you pick this one. I hope you pick this.’ That has never happened in heaven, and it will never happen in heaven. So if we’re not talking about things that are sinful versus non-sinful, then [there is] wisdom in a multitude of counselors. He will give you the desires of your heart. We seek first the kingdom of heaven, right? So you do that. You do what you find in the Scriptures. And then, don’t be afraid to receive the good things that the Lord puts in your path. So again, it goes back to those scriptural principles that we read and live by. And part of that is the way that the Lord puts us together and the passions that he gives us.”
2. What would you tell young people who’ve been raised in Christian, conservative homes and are looking to go to secular colleges, graduate schools, or law schools?
“Don’t do it. No, I, think we have to be, as Scripture teaches us, wise as serpents and innocent as doves. So … number one, recognize I’m going into enemy territory. Number two, go and get what you need. And number three, get out [when you’re finished]. The problem comes when we’re not discerning about that at all and when we go into it thinking that we don’t need to be on guard, [and] we go into it naively — ignoring the fact that these places are literally enemies of God, that they are literally designed to undermine, to weaken, and —in many instances — to destroy the very faith that you hold dear. So if you’re going that route make sure … that you have your eyes wide open and make sure that you’re on guard. Also, make sure that when you get there, you do everything that you can to surround yourself with like-minded people who can walk with you in the process and can help you keep on guard because you’ll need to.”
3. What would you tell Christians in the secular workforce who face challenges for their beliefs?
“That is the Christian life, right? And we’re reminded to put on the whole armor of God … recognizing the fact that we’re not fighting against flesh and blood. We’re fighting principalities and powers — and this thing is bigger than us. So we need armor that is not our own. …. Don’t forget that we desperately need to be under the ministry of the word on a regular basis. And don’t forget that being under the ministry of the word on a regular basis means that we need to be in the community of faith. Also, don’t isolate yourself, which is something that we have a tendency to do. … Isolation can be deadly. So remember those ordinary means of grace. Remember those habits and practices that we need to put in place. Remember that we need to be under the ministry of the word privately, publicly, and corporately in the local church — and that we need to surround ourselves with strong Christian relationships.”
4. How do we know when we’ve found ‘the one’?
“You know, here’s the advice: Don’t spend time with people who are not marriage material. And when I’m talking about spending time, I’m talking about investing in relationships. … It doesn’t take long to figure out if somebody is marriage material or if they’re not marriage material. So that’s number one. The second thing is, recognize whether or not you are marriage material. If somebody else is not marriage material, there’s nothing you can really do about that if you’re not marriage material. That’s something you can work on. And so, familiarize yourself with what the Lord teaches us about marriage — about being a husband, about being a wife. Familiarize yourself with what’s there in places like Ephesians 5; seek the Lord in that regard. So make yourself ready, and then look for people who are ready. And when you’re ready and you find someone who’s ready, go get married.
“It’s just such an awesome thing. I think your generation is told that marriage is kind of like the capstone event of your life. You get a job, you get a house, you go see seven continents, and then you’ve got $100,000 in the bank, and then you just go get a spouse as kind of like the cherry on the top. But really, I think God designed marriage to be a cornerstone event of your life. And if God provides that person, you just build your life around that. Not like the trophy that you get at the end of the journey. But the cornerstone of the beginning of the journey. You will do well.”
5. What would you say to people in this generation who have a perfectionist mindset on marriage?
“Marriage [is] the uniting of two sinners into a relationship that will bless you and test you and shape you and fashion you. … A lot of people in your generation are not getting married because [they’re paralyzed by indecision]. You’ve got endless dating apps and all this other stuff, and everybody’s just so afraid that the perfect one is one swipe away, and this one seems perfect. But if I settle on this one, then I’m not swiping anymore. And if I’m not swiping anymore, then the one who’s really the perfect one may [be a few swipes away]. So there’s just this paralysis by analysis, right? And so, what ends up happening is you get married and then you end up facing difficulty because when sinners say, “I do,” … part of the sanctifying process that marriage takes you through is going to bring difficulty and hardship. Well, if you’re of the mindset ‘I’ll know when I made the right choice, because in that choice, I won’t meet the difficulty. I won’t [feel] the hardship,’ then you’re coming and talking to a pastor because [you expected] pure, unadulterated bliss. And yet we’re arguing about leaving the toilet seat up and taking the trash out and this, that, and the other. Did we make the wrong choice? At which time, if your pastor’s worth his salt, he’s going to say something to the effect of, ‘You made the right choice. And the reason that you know you made the right choice is because that ring is on your finger, and you’re married.’
“So live today and every day like you made the right choice. And stop wasting your time wondering about whether you did make the right choice, because you said, ‘til death do us part’ — and you’re not dead yet. So again, don’t get caught up in that [because] you’ll be a person who’s forever running away from difficulty and blaming that on this idea that somewhere out there, there’s this perfect choice that won’t bring you difficulty and that will only bring you pure, unadulterated bliss. And that choice doesn’t exist in any realm.”
6. How can we stand and defend our faith and truth in a hostile culture?
“It’s great that we have Scripture on that: I Peter 3:13-16. ‘Now who is there to harm you if you prove zealous for what is good? But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason, for the hope that is in you. Yet do it with gentleness and respect, having a good conscience, so that when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame’ (ESV).
“I think we do well to keep that in mind, and the first part of that has to do with even our attitude and perspective, which is one that is not fearful. Not having the fear of men. But the other is always being ready to give an answer. Know what you believe. Know why you believe it and be able to communicate that in a winsome and effective way. And I think that’s often where we get tripped up. Because if I don’t know what I believe in, [and] I don’t know why I believe it, then I’m going to make a fool out of myself. And if I make a fool out of myself, I’m not going to want to do that again. So I will shut it down. [But when we’re silent] and try to avoid conflict — try to keep [our] head[s] down — we end up not being an effective witness, because that’s fear of man. You don’t have to know every worldview out there. You don’t have to know every ideology out there. You have to know what you believe and why you believe it. And you have to be able to communicate that in a winsome and effective manner. You stand on that ground. And then as you gain knowledge … that’s great. You can add that to your arsenal. But in general, just be concerned about having a firm grasp on the faith, a firm grasp on Christian doctrine.”
7. What is your advice on how we can practically live our lives with God at the center?
“My advice is to develop good habits. Develop good habits in all those areas of your life but develop the good habit of getting up [and] spending time with the Lord. Develop the good habit of being faithful in your Christian community. Develop those good habits so that they become foundational. What I’ve found in my own life … is that we tend to slowly move away from our good habits, and life will take every space that you give it. Every vacuum that you create will be filled by something, right? There’s always something that can fill those voids. So what we have to do is we have to have non-negotiables. Decide what things in your life are going to be the non-negotiables. ‘I’m going to do this regardless … and everything else in my life is going to have to find a space around that, because these are the things that I’m committed to.’ You find a lot of young people, they go off to college and, and then they’ll miss church here and there. And the next thing you know, it’s like, ‘Oh, wow, I didn’t go to church all semester. I didn’t go to church all year.’ Or time reading the Scriptures. And it’s like, ‘Oh wow, I haven’t opened my Bible in (fill-in-the-blank).’ And it’s because we’re not developing those good habits, and we’re not making determinations about what the non-negotiables are in our lives. And at the end of the day, that comes from us believing that there are things that are more important that are going to have a higher return on investment. And I guarantee you there are not.”
8. What should our ultimate goal be in life?
“The goal is obedience. The goal is Christ. The goal is always being a faithful servant of the Lord with whatever gifts, talents, abilities, and desires that He’s placed in you. Our goal is not a particular position. Unfortunately, for a lot of people … they say, ‘I want to do this. I want to be that.’ And you’d be surprised how many people when they get to whatever that goal is, they find themselves miserable … because they’re like the dog who caught the car. You know, dogs love to chase cars, but they don’t really know what to do when they catch them. And so, there are a lot of people [who] are doctors or lawyers or you name it, and they finally get that degree, they finally get that position, and they sit there and realize, now what? And there’s this empty feeling that comes along with that. But when your goal is faithfulness to Christ, then whatever position you find yourself in is not an end in itself. It’s a means to an end because your ultimate end is faithfulness — faithful service to the Lord. … This is just the avenue that the Lord is using to gain glory for Himself in and through your life at this particular moment.”
Suzanne Bowdey serves as editorial director and senior writer at The Washington Stand.